Burninating All the Thatched Roofed Cottages

[aggienaut]

   Today a fireman came home to find bees in his chimney. Being a fireman and all, he decided to light a fire to defeat the bees. The bee colony did indeed catch on fire, spewing embers onto the roof. Then the roof caught on fire.
   Being a fireman, the guy sprung into action, and sprayed his roof with foam, putting out the fire.
   Our man Bobby arrives on the scene to find the roof smoldering and covered in foam. The firefighter instructs him to take the bee colony by storm. He is somehow successful despite the smoldering hole in the roof, but returns covered in soot and foam.
   In an unrelated event Bobby got a $100 tip the other day. I guess it all equals out.

   And what's with people thinking they can "smoke the bees out." Just about every time we have bees in a chimney people mention they either attempted that or thought about doing that, or ask us if thats what we're going to do (even on non-chimney calls we get asked if we're going to smoke them out a significant amount of the time). I suppose people got this notion from a vague recollection that beekeepers use smoke on their bees. However, it seems to me that anyone that recalls that, should also recall that beekeepers aren't trying to kill or drive away their bees. Beekeepers are trying to pacify their bees.
   You see, applying smoke to bees essentially makes them think they their home is on fire. This makes them distracted and disinterested in stinging you. When your home is on fire no amount of stinging anyone is going to save it. (They're concentrating on preparing to evacuate). However in a stroke of real bee genius, the procedure for preparing to evacuate is to gorge oneself on the honey (to take it with you), but they invariably gorge so much that they can barely fly anymore. Anyway, the bottem line is smoking is not done by beekeepers to drive their bees away, and its not gonna work for anyone else either. You'll burn your roof off first.


   In other news, today I applied for a job as a United States Foreign Service Diplomatic Security Special Agent. As it requires that one either have a bachelors degree or be within nine months of getting one, I think its officially the first job I've applied to with my anticipated degree as a qualification. I'm not really expecting to get it (what with 100-120 special agents being hired at this time nationwide) but figured I might as well apply. After scrutinizing the application I was rather suprised to find that I was fully qualified. It sounds like it would be a pretty excellent job if one got it.


   Also, yesterday we jostled a property management company with 14 apartment complexes away from a competitor ("Busy Bee") because we were more responsive than them.
   Also today I earned the company $150 by hopping and batting an abandoned wasps nest off a carport with my hand. Including driving time that was probably about $30 a minute for us (it was right on our way to a different location).


Picture of the Day

Alexis the French Guy playing chess at Diedrichs

Previously on Emosnail
   Two Years Ago Today: Aquabats Show - And I rescue a bee at Wild Rivers and name it Randal and there's dramatic speculation about whether Anna & Croat are dating, which is funny in retrospect because they did end up dating later.
   Year Ago Today: Photo Essay: An Evening at Diedrichs - RECENTLY DECLASSIFIED - Yeah I dunno, its Diedrichs circa last summer. Check it out.

Comments

[suddencasualty.livejournal.com]

Can I call you a secret agent ninja if you have the job?

secret agent ninja

[emosnail.livejournal.com]

Heck I've already begun calling myself that!

Re: secret agent ninja

[suddencasualty.livejournal.com]

snaaaps.
you got me there.

[pavel-lishin.livejournal.com]

But if smoke makes bees think their home is on fire, and convinces them to evacuate the place, wouldn't they evacuate the chimney? Do they just come back periodically to see if their beehive is magically restored?

[emosnail.livejournal.com]

Nah, like I said, in a stroke of bee genius their response is to load up on as much more honey than they can carry, and end up loaded down and unable to move. I dunno how they ended up being so plaztarded about that one.

To my knowledge bees under no conditions abandon a hive and relocate. They'll establish new hives by sending out half their population, but once established I tihnk a colony tries to work things out where it is until its last dying breath.

[pavel-lishin.livejournal.com]

It's amazing that they've survived this long.

[emosnail.livejournal.com]

well people don't light their homes on fire very much, at least not as frequently as they spawn new colonies. All in all I think they have a more feasible business model than humanity.

[pavel-lishin.livejournal.com]

That's a good point.

I'm pretty glad that I don't die every time I punch somebody, though.

For the Queen!!

[emosnail.livejournal.com]

Yeah, they're the original suicide bombers.

hola

[inequity.livejournal.com]

Diplomacy


the player lineup.

1. You
2. Your friend (Alexis)
3. Brian
4. Jim
5. My Father
6. Myself
7. (anyone interested?)

They have been introduced to the rules.
As far as i still know Creepy Brian still has the Diplomacy rulebook.

Re: hola

[emosnail.livejournal.com]

Sweet. In the (likely) circumstance that I don't get off work early enough to allow us all to get together in time to play during the week, I say we plan on definitely going for it on Sunday.