The Agrinautica

Two entries in two days! A modern miracle! Also, I've been having a thought. I now have a huge 250gb memory card for my phone, I reckon that could hold a lot of video. Previous attempts to video anything at all on trips filled my phone memory up after about five minutes of footage tops. I'm thinking of trying to do a video diary (or perhaps a "vlog" as the cool kids call it) on my next trip. I wouldn't be able to upload it until I get back because even in the first world uploading video is a beast, and I have zero video editing experience, but it might be interesting, and then instead of it taking six months for me to update, the update would already "be written," and just need uploading. Whaddaya think?


(Previously on Emo-snal: several hours of mild discomfort followed by forty minutes of terrifying hell)


Friday, November 6th, Day 34, Kampala, Uganda - We had a meeting at the US Embassy at 2pm. Realistically one might hope to get there within an hour from where I was, but knowing the traffic and Ugandan attitudes towards timeliness, I told Alex to pick me up at 11:00, three hours before our appointment. Alex's organization does development work in Uganda, but they had no relationship with the United States Agency for International Development (USAID), a major source of funding for development projects, so I had arranged this meeting. The nice woman working on USAID at the US Embassy had had a pretty busy schedule but managed to fit us in to a narrow window at 2:00, so I tried to emphasize to Alex that this was very important that we get there on time. I told him the day before, I told him earlier that morning.
   Needless to say, 11:00 came and went with no sign of him. I basically texted him every ten minutes after that asking where he was, as my own stress (and I really don't stress much) reached new levels of hysteria. 11:30 came and went. 11:45. 12:00. He always assured me they were "on their way" (I've commented on this before, it seems to be normal in Africa to lie and tell someone you're on your way when you aren't even anywhere NEAR getting on your way) 12:30. 12:45. Hyperventilation sets in.
   At 1:20 he FINALLY FINALLY rolls in with his colleague Emmanuel (in Emmanuel's car, Alex's still being at the hotel, he'd have to return again some time to finally retrieve it).
   Before we leave the leafy green confines of the Forest Cottages Hotel behind let me note that it was alright, it was leafy and green and pleasantly didn't feel like it was in the middle of the city, as it was ... but I still would recommend you stay in the Malakai Eco Lodge next time you go to Kampala, which is also leafy and green and full of beautiful gardens and ponds and.. really more garden than lodgingspace.
   But anyway, we were on our way. Being the middle of the day it wasn't the awful barely-moving rush hour traffic I had encountered the night before, but there's always traffic in Kampala. I was of course stressing out the whole time and sent the woman from the embassy an extremely apologetic email saying we may be late. But then, to Emmanuel's navigation and journey-estimating credit, we did actually arrive at the embassy just minutes before 2:00. It was remarkable, really.


   Next we were off to the bus stop! I was to catch a bus back to Nairobi, but not only that, but recall I had only intended to stay in Uganda for two days, and then Grace had returned to Nairobi and intended to send me more of my stuff. Well she did that, and Emmanuel was supposed to pick it up when it arrived in Kampala ... which.. he didn't. So now I had to retrieve my stuff from the bus company office just in time to take it back with me to Nairobi. As it happens, my bag had somehow been fairly mauled in transit, developing some gaping holes. So hooray for that completely useless transfer of stuff. But I had also had her send the beesuits I was going to use in Zanzibar, which, I had ended up staying in Uganda instead of returning to Zanzibar. So I gave these suits to Alex for his organization to use. So there was that at least. (and apparently, these bee suits being brand new (donated by Pierce Manufacturing in Fullerton California! Shout out!), apparently the bus company had wanted to charge Grace an extra hefty fee on them because they thought she was selling a product or some such mischief. I swear, getting anything done in Africa...)

   Anyway, and then I returned by overnight bus once again to Nairobi. Arriving in Nairobi I shrugged off the taxi drivers who tried to solicit me as soon as I stepped off the bus and walked a few blocks to the Kahama Hotel, in which I had stayed in 2014. The hotel I'd stayed in earlier in the trip in Nairobi had been a dingy dismal place, and Grace, bless her heart, is a "has the TV going all the time" kind of person which made me feel like I was literally going to lose my mind when I stayed with her so I decided to go with what I knew. Going into fast forward mode now, I had two or three days in Nairobi before my departure, during which I met up with several friends I hadn't had time to see in my earlier frenzied passes through Nairobi. And then:


Monday, November 9th, Day 37, Nairobi, Kenya - Let's start with a little confession, the earlier reported Giraffe Kisses and Giant Spoons actually happened this day, but was rearranged chronologically to fit the LJ Idol topics of the week.
   Anyway, after the elephant and giraffe adventures, phone-camera full of priceless photos of baby elephants, Grace and I found ourselves downtown needing to get home. It was dark (9pm?) and slightly raining. I was going to call an uber with my phone (which, at first I had just assumed uber wouldn't work in Nairobi but after being tipped off by another traveler I found it was really the best way to get around), but we were right by the bus station and Grace was impatient with my posh cab-taking ways, and convinced me to just come grab a bus with her. it would have been less than $6 for the uber and really not more than a five minute ride.
   There was a big crowd of people around the bus stop, and when a bus arrived the crowd would surge at the bus. It should also be noted that I had my big luggage bag with me because we'd stopped by a tailor to have its damages repaired (also just a few dollars. Oh also speaking of cheap Nairobi tailors, I had a nice custom tailored business suit made for me while I was there. Three piece suit for less than $100, it's quite fine! I got measured the first time I passed through Nairobi, tried it on the second time and the tailor noted adjustments that he had to make, and then picked it up this final pass through). So my arms were full with this bag (and the glorious giant wooden spoon I'd picked up earlier in the day). As a bus pulled up bound for our destination Grace bounded on to it, so any trepidation I had about the whole situation now I had no choice but to follow her on. She would later say she had tooold me she'd grab me a seat and I could have just boarded after the crush stopped.. but I didn't catch that. Anyway so as I'm caught in the crush, with my arms full, I felt my wallet levitating out of my pocket. Other pickpocket stories I've heard usually involve pickpockets so crafty that one doesn't notice the theft until hours later, but I definitely felt it, and it was the creepiest feeling. It didn't even happen fast, but with my arms full and a crush of people all around me all I could do is say "hey! HEY! HEY!!!" and by the time people had backed away from me enough for me to turn around or even get a hand to my pocket my wallet was gone. And what's worse, my phone and the whole trip's worth of pictures.
   Another woulda-shoulda-coulda that occurred to me far too late is, I could have had someone dial my number at that moment and some guilty party would be caught with a ringing phone. Oh well.
   My wallet had about $5 in it. By far the biggest loss was the photos on my phone. I texted my number from Grace's phone saying I'd pay them for my photos but never got a response. I also immediately called Wells Fargo from Grace's phone and so my cards were cancelled not ten minutes after the theft, so I hope they had fun with their five dollars.
   As it happens the only home phone number I had memorized was my parents house line which was "finally" cancelled just earlier in the year, so I couldn't tell them what happened. In fact the _only_ number I had memorized was my boss's. So I texted my boss to ask him for my mom's number (which he has because sometimes he forwards requests for speakers about bees for kids to her), and then I was able to call my parents, vent to them about what happened, and they set about cancelling my phone and other assorted necessities for me.
   Back at Grace's (I had checked out of the hotel since I was catching the flight at 4am), after the necessary actions had been taken, I entered kind of a catatonic level of shock. I know I know, it's not like someone died, there's worse problems, but the violation factor of having things stolen from my pockets and the loss of all my pictures was a pretty big deal to me. Not merely because I happen to really like pictures but in a very real way it was a problem -- I'd been fundraising all year for this project in Tanzania and now.. poof, I had lost 90% of the proof that I actually did it!!
   Grace offered me alcohol but when I'm really depressed only caffiene makes me feel better, so I had two red bulls while she drank a good amount of whisky on my behalf.
   At 1am our cab showed up and we proceeded to the airport. Fortunately there's no traffic at night. Grace had consumed a decent amount of whisky I guess and was feeling a bit of the effects-- she wrote her phone number down for me at least three times, and when I tried to decline the fourth time, just as we were pulling up at the terminal, she got mad thinking I didn't want to have her number and was thus mad at me as I exited the car and didn't really say goodbye.
   But then just after I had gone through the terminal entrance metal detector she comes running in after me in tears like a scene from a movie. It was cute.


Tuesday, November 10th, Day 38, Addis Ababa, Ethiopia - Arrived in Addis fairly early in the morning (I don't know, maybe 8?), with not a penny to my name. Now, on my way to Nairobi 38 days earlier I had planned an eight hour layover in Addis, but they wouldn't let me out of the airport even if I was willing to pay for a visa. When I changed my flights around I made sure to make sure I'd be able to get out of the airport, so I had gotten one of the earliest flights in that day and latest flight out (they don't DO overnight layovers apparently), and the assurance by the ticket agent that I'd be able to leave the airport -- in fact they charged me $78 in advance for the transit visa (which apparently comes with transportation to and from a hotel I can hang out with in the mean time). So You might be able to imagine my frustration when once again the airline agents at the airport refused to give me a transit visa. They said it wasn't in their computer and it wasn't on my receipt (which was a thick page of gobble-de-gook). I was very frustrated!! Finally I found the number "$78" among the jibberish on my ticket and demanded "okay what is this charge for??" and after scrutinizing it they sullenly said it looked like a transit ticket but was coded wrong .. and issued me my transit visa. Welcome to Ethiopia! I must say I love the country but every one of my experiences with their airport staff has been this kind of obstinate bureaucratic unhelpfulness.
   Rode the shuttle to the hotel they had booked me into, which was "nice" but the staff were as cold and unhelpful as the airline staff (in wild contrast to the hotel I'd have stayed in if I had a choice, where every single staffmember was memorable and friendly). My first goal once I'd set my bags down there was to see if I could go get some money. Grace had given me 2000 Kenyan shillings, about $20, which constituted a significant portion of her monthly rent. This was the only thing I had by way of money. As it happens the hotel was just a short walk from several different international business banks .... not ONE of which would exchange Kenyan shillings, the currency of their neighboring country!! So I was left pennyless in Ethiopia. (When I got home I immediately wired Grace $100 to repay her $20)
   It was an interesting experience. I so very very badly wanted just one cup of the wonderful coffee they have in Ethiopia ... I couldn't afford even just one cup. Usually traveling in places like Addis one feels a bit like a millionaire, I can do absolutely whatever I please without the least fear it will dent my wallet. Take a taxi anywhere, take a dozen people out to dinner, whatever. I tried to look at it as a cultural experience. Being penniless in an African city.
   Next I returned to my room and posted this entry which I'd been slowly slowly working on during the trip.

   Next my plan was to meet up with my friend Addis. She came to see me at the hotel but I felt really bad being utterly pennyless. I had a meal voucher at the hotel but I couldn't even buy her coffee!!! I felt awful.
   For dinner I had a meal voucher at the hotel, so we ate there. Though I told her that she'd have to pay for her own meal somehow this didn't get across correctly, because she ate too but then couldn't afford to pay for her meal (which was only like $5!!!), and despite the miniscule amount of money involved, I couldn't help either!! I felt awful x10! And on top of that the hotel shuttle for the airport was leaving just then and I had to get on it. She called a friend or family member to come bail her out and I had to run. I felt so so terrible for leaving her in the situation, for the entire situation, but there was nothing I could do! I had to run!! ):
   ...so as soon as I got home I wired her $100 as well, which hopefully ameliorated her anger, she wasn't very happy with me in the immediate aftermath.


One last penniless misadventure:
Wednesday, November 11th, Day 39, Dublin, Ireland - This time we were actually permitted and required to disembark the aircraft, go through a metal detector, and reboard. after going through the screening area we were sitting in a little waiting area where there was a little airport cafe, which had a guinness tap. I hadn't set foot back in Ireland in 20 years so I would very very much have liked to have had a fresh Dublin guinness.... but... utterly penniless. ): So I could only gaze at it longingly.
   As it happens I got to talking to a young fella who was an Ethiopian who's been living in the United States, has a family there. After awhile I mentioned the Guinness tap and how I wished I had money, honestly without the least intention of soliciting a drink but he immediately thought having a guinness was a fantastic idea and volunteered to get us both a beer! ....... but then it turned out the tap was actually not hooked up at the moment. ): Almost!!!


   And then I returned to America. THE END!

   I apologize for interrupting the blogging about about the Guinea project. I'll try to squeeze that in somewhere. But in the mean time, I'm out in the field!

Previously: So my primary goal for this trip is to reach the Hadza People, hunter gatherers in central Tanzania (Singida). My primary contact with this is a certain Dr K we shall call him, who works with them in some capacity. Previous to coming out here I'd checked in with him every few months, and in July before buying my tickets I called for final confirmation that I'd be able to visit them at this time and all, and he said "oh call back in mid september," which was frustrating since I was aiming to begin the project in late September, so I just went ahead and booked the ticket (and started developing fallback plans). In mid September I called again and he said "Call when you get to Nairobi," and I of course pressed him "everything is ready for my visit right??" and he vaguely assured me it was.

Days 0: Monday, October 5th - Arrived in Nairobi, called Dr K and told him I expected to be in Singida "Thursday or Friday." Hotel I booked (as usual, using tripadvisor on my phone on the way to the airport) turned out to be kind of dumpy, water didn't work at all in the first room they put me in, which was also tiny, but then I was able to convince them after the first day to upgrade me to a better one at the same price.


But the hotel did have this sweet roof area

   Had good times in Nairobi seeing friends. Was going to take the bus to Tanzania on Wednesday but ended up having to push that till Thursday. Thursday (yesterday) mornign I caught the bus at 06:45 in the morning. Sat next to a young lady from Buenos Aires who has been working for Air B&B in Barcelona. She revealed that apparently Uber (the app based taxi service) works just fine in Nairobi and she's been using it to get about! Also she said she uses tinder to find other traveling expats in the area, which was a startling revelation to our other seatmate (a Pole living and working in Dublin), but it just cracked me up because I had already noticed this use of tinder. I forget did I write about my tinder contact from Guinea?
Tangental Aside: In brief: in Conakry, Guinea, the only people on tinder were medical volunteers in Freetown, Sierra Leone, some 80 miles away. This one girl I talked to a little, and then after I got home to California she was like "was that you??" and I was like "when?" and she was like "that charming lanky gentleman on my flight into Atlanta who got pulled over at the CDC checkpoint and was headed to California" Turns out we "met" while 80 miles apart in West Africa and then happened to sit next to eachother at ebola screening some 1,500 miles west in the Atlanta airport and didn't put it together until a few thousand miles later... /end tangental aside

Arusha - As we rolled into town I looked up hotels on TripAdvisor, narrowing it down to one that was $30 a night with relatively good reviews and one that was $47 with really rave reviews. Feeling a little guilty for not taking the cheapest option I went for the more expensive one. I'm not sure I trust a $30 hotel anyway.

   Arriving at the bus stop the shuttle bus driver indicated a taxi driver that he had somehow decided to recommend and said to me "use this man." I asked him how much it would be but the driver responded with poorly composed unrelated questions (basically "you here for Safari?" "nope" "first time in Arusha?" "nope"). Once we were underway he tried to push me to let him take me to "my [his] hotel," which I think would have been $12 a night, but I had all too good idea of what kind of quality I might find at some $12 hotel being pushed by a stodgy taxi driver and just kept repeating "Mvuli Hotel" every time he brought it up. He didn't seem to know where the Mvuli Hotel was so I told him the address as found on trip advisor and watched the handy "distance" indicator to make sure we were steadily heading towards it (see all the fun advantages to having data connection! (my phone wasn't working in Kenya even though it should have).

   Arriving at the hotel he told me "50,000" ($25), which I told him "no way, I'll give you 25,000" He countered with 35,000, and I said "I'll be right back and trotted up to the hotel lobby. After I explained the disagreemenet the manager came out to talk to him ... and ended up paying him 20,000.

   Then I went to check in and someone brought me a nice cold glass of fresh fruit juice as I was filling out the form. I kind of liked that they didn't ask if I had a reservation or anything, just acted like they were magically expecting me all along, led me up to my room without even asking what kind of room I wanted. After the stress of dealing with a shady taxi driver this kind of "voila" service felt so nice. Room was beautiful nad clean with a balcony overlooking a banana plantation. As the girl who'd showed me to the room asked if I had any questions as she turned to go I asked how much it was, afraid a room this nice would be more than the price listed on TripAdvisor, and she said "$52" which is certainly close enough.

   Also I told the front desk I planned to continue by bus to Singida the next day and asked if they could help me book it. They said yes they would book it for me, and an hour or so later they called up to me in my room to say that they'd booked me a ticket, the driver would take me from the hotel at 5am and so they'd have a breakfast packed for me. Ticket would be 18,000 -- it would cost less to get to a city several hours away than I had paid the taxi driver to get here from the bus stop! They also asked for the number for my contact in Singida so they could call him to tell him I was coming. In summary, this is what I'd call five star service, from a $50 hotel! I am quite pleased with my hotel selection.

   As it happens I had already called my contact. Dr K, whom you'll recall I had informed of my arrival most recently just days ago, seemed entirely surprised when I informed him I'd be arriving the next day and said "oh.. I'm leaving tomorrow for Arusha, then I am to visit some Maasai and will return on Sunday." the line cut out before I could ask if we could meet up here or if he'd at least give me a ride back down to Singida. But as this happened immediately prior to the hotel calling up to tell me they'd bought the ticket I had to go down there and say "sooo about that"

   Suffice to say I wasn't terribly pleased with Dr K yesterday. He knew what day I was coming long in advance, if he couldn't be there he could have told me and I could have planned accordingly to not have four random days in Arusha. This is why I planned a month for a week long project though -- I know how these things go (#ThisIsAfrica)

   I had also developed three fallback plans in preparation for this one completely falling through and fallback plans 1 and 2 falling through as well...


Day 5: Friday, October 9th (today) - Went down to the front desk to ask what kind of day trip things there are to do around here, they listed several interesting things such as a "snake park," museum, and a waterfall one can hike to (I've jokingly remarked before that the purpose of traveling is to see waterfalls). I emailed my friend Simon in the nearby town of Moshi and he got back to me as well with some local events. My friend Krysten, an American who works with some people in a village near the Serengeti on a beekeeping cooperative, and is the one who originally talked me into this project, was also very helpful in giving me contacts of people she knows who can help me get around. In Africa your social network is really a lifeline.

   I also learned today that my project in Nicaragua in November has to be postponed several months -- Nicaragua has this daft idea to build a canal to compete with the Panama, it's being pushed by some Chinese engineering company, and to do this they nationalized a large amount of land, which has lead to a great deal of unrest.
   As a result though, I no longer have to be back in California at the beginning of November, so I'm thinking of trying to hit all three of my fallback plan sites: (1) "Krysten's village near the Serengeti, to get to which I'll have to travel through bothe Ngorongoro National Park as well as the Serengeti, so that should be really interesting! (2) Pemba Island, the smaller of the two main islands of Zanzibar, where the local beekeeping cooperative has been very communicative and inviting; (3) Uganda, where a beekeeping development organization had reached out to me for assistance.

   Today after breakfast (complimentary in the hotel restaurant of course) I called Dr K again, to see if he wanted to meet up in Arusha and ask if he could give me a ride to Singida with him on Sunday, but it cut out just after he said "oh I'm not headed to Arusha right now there's been an accident and one of my assistants was involved..." leaving me now entirely unsure if he'd even be ready for me on Sunday ::bangs head against wall::

   Shortly later they called up from the front desk asking if I was still going on Sunday, if they should reschedule the ticket or try to get my money back (which btw they haven't had me hand them any money for it yet. Presumably quietly adding it to my tab, which is nice actually, not having to constantly shuffle money), so I called Dr K one more time crossing my fingers and this time got out of him that he will indeed be making a transit from Arusha to Singida on Sunday and can drive me.

   I ran downstairs to tell them, and then since they were just about to drive some other guests into town (town center is just like a mile or two away), I grabbed my camera and hopped in as well. I opted to go to the historical museum, which was pretty neat. I kept reading about the "boma" (fort) the Germans built in the early 1900s and was wondering where it was until it finally dawned on me that the museum itself was the Boma. Sounds like the German colonials were much more disliked than the British who replaced them after WWI. Museum also had a very nice ecology exhibition with really good photos of a very wide variety of local wildlife, almost all by this one Swedish zoologist Dick Persson, who had certainly amassed quite the collection of good pictures of all kinds of local animals it seems. I particularly liked that insects had not been neglected -- all too often local insect life is completely left off from nature guidebooks.

   After this I was standing in the entryway squinting at tripadvisor on my phone to try to find a good place to eat nearby when the museum receptionist came by and asked me how I was, when I mentioned I was looking for someplace to eat she immediately directed me around the corner of the Boma. I found a cute little outdoor restaurant there in the shade of banana trees and the "piri piri beef" (spicy beef) I had was absolutely delicious.



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[wrote the above, but then the internet never came back yesterday]


Day 6: Saturday, October 10th (today) - Went hiking up to a neat waterfall in the morning and after that went to sort of little reptile zoo with local large reptiles, inlcuding two types of large monitor lizard, two types of crocodile (Nile and narrow snouted (the latter an endangered species of Lake Tanganyika)), and a whole bunch of snakes (it's called the Snake Park after all), including some very large pythons. I thought pythons eating people was an urban legend but they said it was well documented and had several pictures of pythons with large human shaped lumps in them.



   Just talked to Dr K on the phone and tomorrow at 11 he should be here to pick me up!

Tuesday, November 25th, Nairobi - Nairobi is a city that at first glance looks modern, many glassy skyscrapers just towards the sky sporting creative modern designs. Billboards advertise cell phone plans and insurance companies. But as you pan downward to behold the street level then you see the throngs on the sidewalks, they're busy, and some are well dressed, and all seem to be hurrying somewhere, which is a plus, but many seem a bit rumpled and harried, in places the sidewalk is broken to the degree of just being dirt. But what really catches your eye at street level is the traffic. It's bumper-to-bumper throughout the daylight hours. To get anywhere in the city by vehicle seems to take an hour, even if it's just a mile away. You're better off walking (and downtown was actually walking distance)

   In particular, our hotel, this cute little place called the Kahama, seemed to have a permanent traffic snarl in front of it. It was an elegant looking building, that looked like it had seen better days, had been proudly built in a nice location just beside a river ... and then a freeway overpass had been built right in front of it, such that it's second floor windows stare blindly into the concrete sides of the overpass and the third floor looks out at the cars. The old front door was then permanently locked, the former more upscale owners no doubt sold it to this budget hotellier, a new front door was put in the back, and the Kahama was born -- "economy with style!"

   Due to the barrier of awful traffic I was content to stay inside and catch up on my travelogue and picture wrangling, but around 11:30 Doug talked me into going with him to the craft market. The driver for the hotel (a very nice mellow old man, old enough to be retired, but working to save enough to buy his own car for about $6,500) had a friend with a booth in the craft market, so we headed there.
   Took only 10-15 minutes to get there I think, once out of the snarl by the hotel we traveled by side streets and it wasn't bad off rush-hour. We packed all our stuff in the trunk and checked out of the hotel so we wouldn't have to get back through the traffic maelstrom there.

   The craft market consisted of little booths that were facing inward on either side of a narrow aisle. Each booth was stuffed with things, and manned by a proprietor who would tell you they made it all themself. Sometimes though they'd only lay claim to the beaded bracelets and such and not the carved ebony, which is more plausible. The proprietors were mainly women, and they could be quite insistent.
   "Please, please, just look! Just look at this! I'll give you a very special deal! I made this myself! Look! two for this price... No, don't go, look at this!" I jokingly covered my eyes and said "I don't want to see it, I have no money!"
   Despite my intention not to get anything, the lady our driver knew did have some very nice bracelets. I don't know who I'd give them to, but someone would appreciate them. One was made with porcupine quills, which I thought was novel, and another with camel bone. Or so they say. I'm entirely cynical. But it seemed entirely plausible (not like that "lion tooth" some fat man in maasai robes sold to Doug after claiming he killed the lion himself). I had to carefully budget my money though because I now had only enough to pay the driver (as well as two old $20 bills that no one would accept. I hadn't started out with them but I'd exchanged local currency with other tourists at various points to take these "useless" bills off their hands). The two bracelets still sit on my mantel two months later gathering dust. No one to give them to.



   After we had finished there, we continued on past a jewelers booth, which actually had a lot of really nice pieces. And I'm not by any means a connoiseur of jewelry, but these things looked nice. Doug was haggling with him for one or two necklaces for his wife, and the prices were around 1300-1500 shillings ($14-$17), which seemed like a deal to me. I was well and truly out of money and alas have no one to get such nice things for but I had half a mind to go back when I had money and buy several just because I reckon I could put them up for sale back in the states for easily $60 each.
   As we were trying to leave the stalls Doug pointed out some cow horns on a shelf. I have a thing for large cow horns. At first I was unimpressed, just seeing short normal horns, but then I saw a nice big three footer and made the mistake of showing much enthusiasm, and the shop owners was on me like some sort of mind-sucking alien. You know the kind that grabs you by the head with their face tentacles. I told him I really didn't have any money but was curious how much he would want for it. He said $100. I said I got one like that that was all decorated in Guinea for less than $20 (I think it was seriously like $12) and he shook his head and said he couldn't go lower than $60. He was practically physically blocking my escape but I managed to extricate myself and flee. Then we had to come back that way to get out of the narrow labyrinth of craft stalls, and he again accosted me and said he'd called his dad (keep in mind he himself looked 40) and could sell it for $30. I said I didn't have money and he said he'd go with me to the ATM. He followed me out of the craft market but we escaped into the car.


A necklace Doug got for his wife

   From there we went to a mall for a quick meal from the food court, which was about as unimpressive as mall food court food usually is, but hey I've had worse. Also you may be intrigued just to know that in Nairobi they have malls that look very much like our own, in all their teeming mundanity. Then onward to the airport, arriving in plenty of time around 2:30, three hours before the flight. Check in line moved like molasses and this shady guy behind us kept trying to weasel his way forward in line. Ultimately it doesn't matter if you're a few people ahead or behind checking in but the shadiness of his behaviour really pissed me off. I made a point to stand right next to the post every time the line zigged around so he couldn't scoot ahead of us as he was trying to. Since I'd bought some stingless bee honey in Tanzania I had to check a bag at the ticketing counter.
   A friend who had run the NGO that brought Doug and I to Ethiopia the first time was going to meet us on arrival and take us to find a hotel. That NGO no longer operates in Ethiopia but he was kind enough to volunteer to help us anyway .. except just before boarding, with the last gasp of battery power in my phone I saw I had a message from him saying he unfortunately couldn't make it. Great, so no one was meeting us, we had no hotel lined up, and my phone was dead so I couldn't use it to look for a hotel. We were dropping into Ethiopia with literally no idea what we were going to do when we got there.
   To board the plane at the gate we had to go through one more x-ray machine (Ethiopian Airlines are crazy about security), and they didn't like my rungu, a decorated wooden stick that I suppose is shaped like a small club, which Maasai men apparently carry "so they'll look busy" (kind of like a clipboard in our society), so I had to check my backpack at the gate. Took my laptop out since I'd never trust it out of my sight, and boarded the plane with just my laptop and camera as carry-on, anxious that I'd never see my backpack again.



   Food on the flight was remarkably bad. I mean airline food is infamously bad as it is, but they gave us some kind of clammy reconstituted block of chicken as our main entree. As the trash was being collected I looked around and nearly every passenger whose tray I could see had eaten the carrot salad and other sides but barely touched the clammy block of chicken-spam.
   As it had last time I flew to Ethiopia, Addis Ababa suddenly emerged through darkness of over a ridge as a vast expanse of twinkling blue lights, shining like stars down below.
   Arriving in the immigration / passport control hall we first had to run a gauntlet of people in white medical coats and breathing masks, who took our temperature with hand held laser thermometers and collected forms we'd filled out saying we didn't have ebola. Then, after winding through the visa-on-arrival line for about ten minutes we noticed the line jumper from the Nairobi airport. This time he was standing off to the side of the front of the line just beginning to unhitch the line guide-rope in front of him, but he saw me fix a fiery glare upon him (The "old salty" is an ancient sailor's secret, the saltiest of sailors can start fires merely by giving their glare on the wood) and he retreated. I swear some people are just pathologically criminal, it would be easier to stand in line like a normal person but he has to try to cheat.
   A visa on arrival is just $20. Next I had to go through passport control, where they always ask all these questions about where one is staying and what one is doing. I didn't know the answers to these questions so I was a little bit anxious. By pure chance just before I reached the front of that line I noticed the two guys in front of me were speaking Norwegian, so I started talking to them in Swedish. Turns out they were here as missionaries. Then they got called to the passport control kiosk, and then I did ... and the officer there, having seen us speaking Swedwegian together said to me "you're with them right?" and after I made a vaguely affirmative noise proceeded to stamp my passport without asking any further questions.

   Next challenge! After emerging into the controlled area: where to go to from here? While trying to find out what the birr-dollar exchange rate was (no one would tell us), we finally found a guy with strangely bulgy eyes at the hilton hotel booth who would deign to tell us (20 birr to the dollar). Since he was so helpful we asked if he knew any good cheap hotels (as opposed to the hilton, which is of course NOT cheap). He said he "knew just the place!" whipped out his cellphone and placed a call, and moments later informed us that the owner herself was coming to pick us up. About fifteen minutes later he got another call and told us to go outside to the black mercedes. Sure enough there was a shiney mercedes there waiting for us, being driven by a well dressed and dignified woman. It seemed suspiciously strange, but she drove us across town to a nice hotel that wasn't too expensive (about $75 a night for a double room). At the hotel we were greeted warmly by extremely friendly staff, including a porter named Addis and a front desk girl named Addis.

   Being as it was late and had been a long day, I then just wrote the first draft of the above, and went to bed.


This is not the receptionist named Addis.