The Agrinautica

   On Wednesday you may recall I went on an epic quest into San Francisco to interview for diplomatic security job. I left here at 7:30am via intercampus shuttle to Berkeley. Arriving in Berkeley around 8:40, I had four hours until my interview at 1pm. I set about trying to call anyone I knew in the area.
   My best friend from high school, Alberto, who lives in SF, appeared to reject my call. I haven't gotten through to him in four years. I found out my friend Mara wasn't able to get the day off work, Russel Renzas was busy studying for a final, and David Allweiss had died the night before.
   He had been a high school classmate of mine. He would have been 23 next Thursday. He was married. Apparently he died of leukemia he didn't know he had -- He was fine until he got a cold earlier in the week. He went to bed, his wife noticed he had very shallow breathing at some point and tried unsuccessfully to wake him, called 911. He died a day or two later in the hospital. He never knew what happened. d= .Requiescat in pace.

   I spent most of the morning at the International House Cafe in Berkeley. Finally I barted it under the bay over to SF to go find my interview. It turned out to be at this very modest looking hotel across from the freemason temple.
   They swore me to secrecy on the content of the interviewing process, I am forbidden from duplicating, reproducing, causing to be reproduced, attempting to reproduce, or a number of other synonyms, the content. Anyway, the process is that there are four different levels of screening one must pass through, and after each one a number of applicants are voted off the island discarded. I made it to the third level, a one on one interview with a special agent. I'm not sure what the odds of that are but he assured me very few people make it that far. Unfortunately I didn't make it to the fourth level to fight the boss monster though.
   They said that persons applying for the second time get considered more seriously, which means two things (A) I can console myself that I was possibly beaten by someone who was simply on their second attempt, (B) I will stand an even better chance if I apply again. Applications are accepted no more than once a year though.
   Though I didn't get the job, I got a lot further than I thought I would, seeing as I originally didn't expect to get past the first screening. So I feel pretty good about the whole thing.

   The only redeeming quality of San Francisco I think is that they actually have bins full of The Onion (in print!). Then I rode the bart back to Berkeley and read my copy of the Onion as I tried not to get scammed by the guy who was tricking people into betting on his card tricks. In particular, I liked the Onion article titled Activist Judge Cancels Christmas.

   Back in Berkeley, I found the student government offices and set off to find evidence of Chief Justice Gregg's court. On the plus side, their court was listed as actually having a room, #114, on the minus side, room 114 did not appear to exist. I did get to meet the president and chief of staff of the ASUCB.
   After this I went for a hot dog at that mecca of weiners, Top Dog, and walked down Telegraph for the sake of doing so. Bought Kristy a rose from the vender I bought her one from the day I asked her out.
   Police cars in Berkeley do not say "911" on the side. No, they say "berkeley.police.edu". So if you have an emergency, you best be near the internet. I thought about taking a picture but didn't quite have the enthusiasm for it.
   Then I realized I'd lost my intercampus shuttle ticket back to Davis. I think it was with the packet of papers I gave to diplomatic security. You can't buy tickets at the door to the intercampus shuttle either.
   I thought I was gonna die. I was tired and just wanted to go home, and without a ticket my only hope was that the driver took pity on me.
   Fortunately, another passenger had an extra ticket and I was saved. The end.


Benjamin Stevenson, Psychiatrist
   I was telling my flatmate Ben the story of The Girl That Had A Boyfriend earlier. After he responded with an in-depth analysis of why she was probably acting the way she was I said "wow you sound like a psychiatrist." To which he responded "I AM a psychiatrist! Well, as of Sunday." He's graduating tomorrow in psych-bio or something. Craziness.

Picture of the Day

Benjamin Stevenson

   Once again I've actually been too busy to write an entry for several days. I find this to be deplorable.


CCC(P)MUNC 2004
   Friday and Saturday there was the Contra Costa County Model UN Conference down in San Ramon in the SBC Palace. No really I took some pictures, hopefully I'll get them up here eventually, in the SBC Centre you can see your phone bills at work: creating palatial buildings with mile-long corridors and multiple lakes. I'm told Kritsy's prom was held there.
   CCCMUN is put on by the CCC Board of Education, traditionally with the UC Davis Secretary-General as their figurehead SG. As such its well funded but usually put together with ridiculous oversights because the people putting it all together have no idea how MUN should be. Last year they outlawed the passing of notes in committee, which is the primary form of communication for delegates. This year things were a lot better. The only glaring problem that comes to mind is that delegates didn't have their country names on their name-tags.. unfortunately though I don't think most of the people reading this will understand the significance of that unless I go into a thorough explanation of how committee works, and I don't think anyone would feel interested in reading that anyway.
   Now normally I have a lot to say about a committee when its over. All these funny little stories about things that happened and inside jokes that developed, but really, I can't think of anything to say about the committee. I think it was shorter than committee usually is -- two half days, whereas I think one full day and one half day is more common. We had 55 delegates in committee, our topic was "International Drug Trade." The representative of Cuba in his first speech explained "Cuba is a communist utopia. We have no drug problem. This is because we execute all those we find are involved with drugs. Through our decisive policy we have rid our country of this problem and we recommend the rest of you do so as well..." this led to some other highlights, for example someone claimed that it costs much more to execute someone than to hold them in prison, to which the representative of Libya responded "in countries such as ours and Cuba, we have a very streamlined legal process so that executing people is actually much cheaper than holding them in prison." Under international pressure to be more merciful, Cuba amended the resolution he was working on to allow first time offenders caught with small amounts of illicit drugs to simply be sent to re-education camps.


Return to the Beginning
   On Sunday Kritsy and I went down to Berkeley, because it was there that a year ago today in the rain on Telegraph we decided that we would be boyfriend/girlfriend (then we ate naan for a dollar and had tea).
   So we were marauding Telegraph and it happens that we find a pair of docs that fit Kritsy perfectly at the Buffalo Exchange for $30. We later found an identical pair of the docs at a shoe store for $150. I think the only reason they were still there is because they had really ugly yellow/brown laces in them. Being that they had twenty pairs of ringlets we put two pink laces into each shoe, tying them in the front and at the top, and I laced them so it makes Xes on alternating sides all the way up. Its kickass, I want to patent the pattern. (=
   Also Moe the Flower-Man thought I gave him a twenty when I gave him a tenner (even though he scrutinized it?), so he tried to give us $16 instead of $6 in change but being the good kids that we are we were like "such sauce Moe." Anyway he was really nice and you all should visit him for your flowering needs.


Erratum
   Two different reporters called me Sunday morning, and I find that they still managed to not check a significant fact against me. The senator they interviewed stated that he didn't know of any time the removal of a court member for absences has come before the Senate. I'd like to point out that (A) thats the point, I was supposed to tell the (then) senate president pro tem who would report it to the senate and he never did and that was the problem and (B) it in fact did happen and last year a court member was considered for removal for that reason before the ASUCD senate. The way it is currently written in the Aggie article it implies I am not reporting unexcused absenses that are occuring, which is a gross misportrayel of the situation.


Picture of the Day

   A reporter covers another of those vigorous rallies of the turbulent 2002/2003 years. My favourite thing about this picture actually is the guy on the left who is like "wtf?! get lost!" to the other guy. Also you'll note the big bald guy on the right, ASUCD presidential candidate of the Leadite party (2002?). I really rather liked the guy actually but his VP running mate was the odious Miss Mary Vasquez, who among other things, stated during a senate meeting that the Irish people had never suffered worth noting and sued the California Aggie because of, and effectively ending, their end-of-the-year humorous edition.


Previously on EMOSNAIL
   Year Ago Last Thursday: Quotes - quotes from my War, Nuclear Weapons, and Military Science professors. My favourite of which was the nuclear weapons professor's explanation of his grading policies: "when you start incinerating people, partial credit is not an option" -- Further Seems Forever also played at Davis on this day.
   Year Ago Last Saturday: The No-Cal/So-Cal Exchange Programme - Croat and Anna come up from OC for the Tiger Army/Necromantix/Rancid show, are convinced UC Davis is PCU. Also ASUCD President Sara Henry and advisor Vicki Swett mess with ASUCD judicial proceedings in contempt and disregard to the constitution and bylaws, and expect me to do the same. Also another great quote from Professor Jensen: "...a kilogram of plutonium contains a metric buttload of energy..."
   Year Ago Today: Miss Kristy Heidenberger became my girlfriend in the rain on Telegraph.

I JUST ATE A CHEESE DANISH
   Actually I just wanted to show off my new-found ability to make scrolling marquees (but I DID in fact just eat a cheese danish). Hellyes. I'm still dying to know how y'all align things on the right side of the screen.


   Anyway. On Friday I took the 14:15 intercampus shuttle down to Berkeley, which arrived there at about 15:30. I was intended to make contact with my elder brother Tobin, and spend the night at his location. Arriving on the ground in Berkeley I located his place of residence immediately, but opted to wander about a bit before attempting to make contact. So I went down to Top Dogger and ate a delicious hotdog, wandered around a bit on Telegraph, and spent most of the afternoon sitting in the warm sun on the steps in front of Sproul Hall, studying.
   Presently I made a few attempts to reach Tobin via telephonemachine, but they were all unsuccessful. I was however able to reach comrade Michelle (Phelps?) on the phone, a girl I dated in 11th grade but since that time have seen but once (for about 30 seconds), and she invited me to a party that evening, so at least I had something to do.
   It became rather nippy out there if I do say so myself, and still unable to reach Tobin or any other locals I could only wander around homelessly.. hang out in shops merely to stay warm. Went to the familiar Durant Hotel to use its restroom... had another hot dog from Top Dogger, and eventually it was 21:00 and I headed down to the party, which was off hearst somewhere a block or two west of shattuck.
   It was a great relief to be definitively out of the cold, and the people at the party were pretty cool.. it was a nice little shindig of a party. Two people there recognized me from earlier in the day (I was wearing my "UC DAVIS" shirt that everyone always asks if I made myself).
   I ended up spending the night on the couch there. Got up at 07:30 and walked up to the Greek Theatre for Tobin's 08:30 gradumatation. There I met up with the rest of my family; the parents and younger brother Eric, an incorrigable troll. Tobin was graduating in Electrical Engineering / Computer Science (EECS).
   Afterwords we met up with Tobin, his latest woman Nadia, and his eternal roommate Chris Perkins. Now Perkins was only Tobin's roommate for I think two of the five years Tobin had been there, but he will ALWAYS be "the roommate," because.. well.. thats what he is. They're like best friends or something.. ::shurg::
   From there we proceeded to my grandmother's-sister's house (great aunt??) where numerous other relatives descended upon us; most of whom came out of Davis actually. There was of course my two aunts/uncles and subsequent little cousins that I'm accustomed to, but then there were some more distant ones that I wasn't familiar with (as Chris Perkins said, "how come they don't know who you are any better than they know who I am?"). Also around this time I think Tobin's latest woman, Nadia, said "you're family is like a sitcom family, there's The Jock, The Punk, and The Nerd." Obviously meaning Tobin was The Nerd... awww "nerrrrdlove!" (as Diane would say). (=
   AAaaand... then I got home -- The End.

   Oh and mother supplied me with like mass cheese danishes and a pood* of salami!


   Kristy's photos from my party in that recent entry are now on a faster better server thanks to codetoad, so if they weren't loading before, they are now.

   *One pood = 36.4 lbs = 40 funt. Archaic Russian measurements of weight.